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Kajal89

Funny Sms......:)

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Ghalib ne girlfriend ko date per bulaya wo late aayi,
Girl: Am I late ?

Ghalib:
Falak pey chand sitaron ko neend aarahi hai,
Doosri ka time ho gaya hai, tu ab aa rahi hai.
:-)

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Husband wanted to call the hospital
to ask about his pregnant wife,
but accidently called the cricket stadium.

He asks, “How’s the situation?”

He was shocked & nearly died on hearing the reply.

They said, “It’s fine. 3 are out,
hope to get another 7 out by lunch,
last one was a duck!”..:-P

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Smile to old means Respect

Smile to child mean Innocence

Smile to friend means Care

Smile in front of mobile, a mental case!

Still smiling? ;-)

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Fact about women:
They can see a hair of a girl
on their husband’s coat from 20 meters,
but can’t see a pillar from 2 meters
while parking a car . . . :-D

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READ THIS SCARY STORY IF YOU DARE.
On a rainy day,
an old man was standing with a book for sale.
A young man came to buy.
He bought the book for Rs.3000.
Old man advised
“DONT OPEN LAST PAGE OF THE BOOK othrwise YOU’ll face problem”
Man finished the book with great fear but didnt open the last page.
.
.
.
But,after a week,
Out of curiousity he opend the last page and..

he almost fainted to see..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Retail Price: Rs 30/-

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In a practical Exam
Examiner showed legs of bird n said:Tell the bird’s name
Sardar:I dont know
Exminer: U r failed.Wats ur name?
Sardar: You see my legs, and tell me.

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Life has so much 2 teach us,1 famous Chinese poet said
“Sifgliyo chi chongloma cyona sung una sevol ping pinago ching”

Really touching na?
I almost cried;->

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Dil k zakham kisi ko dikha na sako ge,
Dil mein jo he kisi ko bata na sako ge,

Karoo ge jawani me jo girlfriend pe kharche,
Budhape tak udhar chuka na sako gay:p

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Train main 1 machar 1 chinese k sar pe baitha,
woh usko pakar k kha gaya!

Phir 1 machar memon pe baitha,
us ne pakar k chinese say pocha:
.
.
.
.
.
Khareedo gay?:D:D:D

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Sometimes wen i cry no 1 c my tears,
wen i m woried no 1 c my pain,
wen i m happy no 1 c my smile
lekin…
sala. 1 ladki k saath ghoomay
to sab dekh lete hai..

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Imagine world without girls
roads sunsan markets viran
na janu na jan
na koi girl friend k liye preshan
bas namaz & quran
&
sarey larke direct jannat ul maqam

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Girl: if u will try 2 kiss me, main shore macha dungi.
Boy:Lekin yahan to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl: i know but formality to poori karni hi padegi..

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Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
That u were sending me
Jewelry and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw
your dad paying the bill !!!

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Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!

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Difference between Husband & gadha.

Ans:Husband gadha ban sakta hai,
but
Gadha itna bhi gadha nahi k husband bane!!

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A person who surrenders when he’s WRONG,
is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE,
is WISE.
A person who surrenders even if he’s RIGHT,
is a HUSBAND.!

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A : u r Active
B : u r Best
C : u r Cute
D : u r my Dearest
E : u r Excelant
F : u r alwayz First
G : u r Great
Sorry cant lie till Z…

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MUNNA BHAI visits Mysore palace.
CIRCUIT: bhai us kursi par mat baithna.
MUNNA: kaiku ?
CIRCUIT: wo tipu sultan ki he bhai.
MUNNA: tension kaiku leta he re maamu ?
aayega to uth jaunga re ,i shappath !!!

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Impact of Movies:

Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?

Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!

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Hi,

Doing nothing?

Then Make a Place,

4 Me in ur Heart!!

I May come there any time!

Ur’s Faithfully,

“HeArT aTtAcK”

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After finishing MBBS… Dr Munna Bhai starts his practice.

He checked his FIRST patient’s eyes,
tongue & ears by TORCH & finally what did he say?

“Battery is OK”

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LECTURER: Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti.

CIRCUIT WRITES: Gandhi was a great man,
but maa kasam i dont know who is Jayanti.
Koi locha-lafda hoga buddhe ka!

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MUNNA BHAI: circuit agar bina daant wala kutta kate to kya karne ka re?
CIRCUIT:simple he bhai, bina sui wala injection lene ka!!!
ha ha ha

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Munna bhai:apun ko kaisy pata chalay ga k ye bakra hai ya bakri?”
circuit:”simple bhai ,pathar mar kar dekho,
ager bhaga to bakra
aur ager bhagi to bakri.

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Most successful
Happy married life is
Defined as.
.
.
.
.
“Yet to be seen”

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Q: If marriages are made in heaven,
than what are made in Hell?

Answer: The days after marriage!

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Why Government do NOT
allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.

Because per Constitution,
you can NOT BE PUNISHED TWICE
for the same Mistake.

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Before Marriage:-

He: yes! atlast it was so hard 2 wait
sheo you want me 2 leave?
He: No! don’t even think about it
She: do you love me ?
Hefcourse! over n over!
She:have u ever cheated on me?
He:No!y r u even asking?
She:will u go on wid me on picnic?
He:every chance I get!
She:will u hit me ?
He:R u crazy?I’m not that kind of person!
She:can I trust u?
He:yes..
She: Darling!

After marriage…
Now simply read from bottom to top

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Man at medical store:I need poison
Chemist: I can’t sell you that

Man shows his marriage certificate
.
.
.
Chemist: Oh! sorry,
I didn’t knew u had a prescription.

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After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife,
You know, I was a fool when I married you.
She replied, Yes dear, I know
but I was in love and didnt notice.

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Man : Is there any way for long life?
Doctor : Get married.

Man : Will it help?
Doctor : No, but the thought of long life will never come.

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Q:Why is a Sardarji standing below
a tube light with a open mouth?

A:Because his doctor advised him
“Today’s dinner should be light”

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A Sardar & his wife filed an application for divorce.

Judge asked :
How will you divide, you have 3 children?

Sardar replied :
Ok! We will apply next year.

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Teacher: what is the scientific formula for water?
Sardar: h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.

Teacher: nonsense! how did you derive that?
Sardar: auntie, it is H to O (h2o)!

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Sardar got job in a telenor call centre.
Customer: telelenor sim blocked what to do?
Sardar: dont take tension remove telenor &
put warid sim.
Thank you for calling ufone.

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A Sardar looking at sky asks another Sardar :
Is that a sun or moon?

Other Sardar replies :
Oye ! No idea…Im new to this city..

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2 Sardars lookin at an Egyptian mummy.

Sardar1:Look so many bandages,
pakka truck accident case hai.

Sardar2: Aaho,
truck number bhi likha hay, BC-1760

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Interviewer asked sardarji:
Which are the 2 latest versions of java?

Sardarji: Marjava & Mitjava

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Sardarji is not sleeping with his wife! these days
Guess why?
because somebody had told him that
it is wrong to sleep with married women.

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Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying….
When a person asked what he was doing….
He replied… Oye!! Higher Studies Yaar…!!!

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Sardar-
why r all these people running?

Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.

Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup,
why r others running?

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Comments

  1. Kajal89's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by king awan
    app k jokes nay too maray pet main dard ho raha hai hus hus k app ke collection best hai dear
    app ka naam kya hai dear mera naam kamran awan from jacobabad sindh
    aagar ho sakay too maray is no par bhee jokes send kr deya kren
    03463988587 plzzzzzz
    i'm glad you enjoyed it....i wont b able to sms you but i can give you some sites that you can use to send yourself these msgs.....and my personal info is in my profile.........more then that i dont know myself.....
  2. Kajal89's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by ~!~hasnain~!~
    nice sharing..........
    Thanks.....I'm glad you enjoyed it.......

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