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Thread: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

      
   
  1. #1
    *Dani*'s Avatar
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    Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?





    اندھیرے کی وسیع سمندر میں روشنی کا ایک نقطہ گرا تھا جو اب بڑھتے ہوئے اندھیرے کو ہر طرف سے پرئے دھکیل رہا تھا۔

    یہ تو آسمان ہے۔۔۔۔ہاں یہ آسمان ہے، نیلا اور اُجلا آسمان۔ " مارک نے اپنے آپ میں سوچا۔"

    مزید پڑھیے۔

    https://www.friendskorner.com/forum/f24/akhri-safar-347704/

  2. The Following 20 Users Say Thank You to *Dani* For This Useful Post:

    - Lily - (06-28-2011), Adiva Afafa (08-31-2011), cymab (06-25-2011), Dia_Komal (06-28-2011), jaddy (06-28-2011), Nabbas (06-27-2011), Pr3ciOuS (06-27-2011), R oC k iN (06-25-2011), Savi Abbas (06-25-2011), shizzi (06-28-2011), smarty cat (06-25-2011), sunnyshah_6 (06-26-2011), Sweet Pakistani (06-28-2011), uzma shah (06-25-2011), withlove (06-30-2011), zahid_is_here (06-29-2011), zeest.sun (06-28-2011), Zunair (06-25-2011), Exquisite (07-04-2011), `BaaRisH` (06-25-2011)

  3. #2
    uzma shah is offline Banned
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Dani.aap ko Mubarak baad doun ya tehreer parh kr apnay jazbaat ko control karoun....aap nay Muhabat ka falsfa byaan kiya hei ya aik mehroumi ko byaan kiya hei...aik acha topic liyaa hei aap nay..aur haqeeqat ko byaan karna,mujhy alfaaz nahi mill rahay.aap ki yeh pehli tehreer may nay parhi hei aur mujhy bhot achi lagi hei..Mujhy Bano k aihsasat aur almaye pr dukh ho raha hei mgr shayd yeh haqeqat bhi hei k Bano jaisee aur bhi khwateen ko chae janay ki khwaish hoti hei q k woh bhi insaan hoti hain .haan paisay kaliye woh apna jisam bachaitee hain aur muhabat samaitati hain.pr jaisee muhabat paisay k bghair ki aap nay khaa tou shyd Bano kaliye yeh ahsaas hi kafi ho k kisee nay uss say sachi muhabat ki thi joh k ubb napaid hoti jaa rahi hei..aur phir karobari aurat say muhabat bhala kub koiee krta hei.....aik baat aur k may nay lafz nahi ko daikha hei k aap nay jub istamaal kiyaa hei tou ya k sath noun k sath nahi..thoara sa main samjh nahi paee k typing mistake hei yaa aap nay nahi lafz ka istamaal aisay kiyaa hei...
    bhot acha topic,aur bhot achi tehreer..
    very well done.

  4. #3
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Salam!! some time people get chance to read the words which come directly by someone's heart and soul......i can feel that this writing has super ability to reflect the women inner feelings about love...relations.....and practical life!! i want to salute you that being a male you wrote this bitter reality with full of sentimental thoughts and touched the height of women inner emotions!! i loved the the lines about the lover who loves her soul and showed the essence of pure love wid unselfishness!! i heartly congratulate you for this bold writing!! i am having hope that you will share more writings in coming future!! thanks alot and blessings!!

    ​​​​


    کترنیں روح کی آؤ کے ,سمیٹیں فرخ
    کیا خبر ، لوٹ کے آجاے رفو کا موسم







  5. #4
    `BaaRisH`'s Avatar
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Bohat Acha Afsana ..!!
    Or Mujey ap ka Unwaan bhi Munfarid Sa Laga...!!
    Ek Zehreeli Sachai k Saath ...
    ye Duniya Aisi he Talkh hai ...
    Yahan Sirf Paisa he Chalta hai ...
    Or Aisi Ortein Hoti bhi badnaseeb he Hain...!!
    کوئی تعلق جو نہ ھوتا تو خفا کیوں ھوتے

    بےرخی آپ کی محبت کا پتہ دیتی ھے







  6. #5
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Hmm KhoOob, Bht Umdaaa

    bare hassas Mozoo pr qalam uthaya or baghair Bhtky huwe use


    kamal ahtiyat se paya-e-takmeel tk pohnchana kamal rakhta he

    keep writing


    ساری دنیا میں مرے جی کو لگا ایک ہی شخص
    ایک ہی شخص تھا ایسا بخدا ایک ہی شخص
    ..............
    وسعت دل میں تنگ دلی کا عالم تو دیکھیۓ
    ایک کو چاهنا، فقط اسی کو چاهنا، پھر کچھ نا چاهنا

    ............
    دل سے نکال دیجئے احساس آرزو
    مر جایئے پر کسی کی تمنا نہ کیجئے۔


  7. #6
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    bhut khoob.........................

    $ρεακ øπlψ ωhεπ ψøu Ŧεεl ψøuƦ ωøƦδ$ αƦε β円εƦ †hαπ ψøuƦ $ιlεπcε




    ƦεʍεʍβεƦ †hα† $ιlεπcε ι$ $øʍε †ιʍε$ †hε βε$† απ$ωεƦ.....

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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Buhat aacha afsaana likha hy ap ne.....
    Mujhay aise afssane aachey lagty hen jo zyida taveel na hon aur baat bhi clear kr den.
    Topic hassas tha tha par kehne ka aandaaz lajawab hy.
    Thanx for sharing and keep it up.

  9. #8
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Quote Originally Posted by uzma shah View Post
    Dani.aap ko Mubarak baad doun ya tehreer parh kr apnay jazbaat ko control karoun....aap nay Muhabat ka falsfa byaan kiya hei ya aik mehroumi ko byaan kiya hei...aik acha topic liyaa hei aap nay..aur haqeeqat ko byaan karna,mujhy alfaaz nahi mill rahay.aap ki yeh pehli tehreer may nay parhi hei aur mujhy bhot achi lagi hei..Mujhy Bano k aihsasat aur almaye pr dukh ho raha hei mgr shayd yeh haqeqat bhi hei k Bano jaisee aur bhi khwateen ko chae janay ki khwaish hoti hei q k woh bhi insaan hoti hain .haan paisay kaliye woh apna jisam bachaitee hain aur muhabat samaitati hain.pr jaisee muhabat paisay k bghair ki aap nay khaa tou shyd Bano kaliye yeh ahsaas hi kafi ho k kisee nay uss say sachi muhabat ki thi joh k ubb napaid hoti jaa rahi hei..aur phir karobari aurat say muhabat bhala kub koiee krta hei.....aik baat aur k may nay lafz nahi ko daikha hei k aap nay jub istamaal kiyaa hei tou ya k sath noun k sath nahi..thoara sa main samjh nahi paee k typing mistake hei yaa aap nay nahi lafz ka istamaal aisay kiyaa hei...
    bhot acha topic,aur bhot achi tehreer..
    very well done.
    Aap ka bohat bohar shukriya aap nay issay aisay sraha.....Darasal "Nahi" ko main mukalmay ki soorat main likhta hoon, mari aisi hi ghalti ko aik do baar pehlay bhi point out kiya gaya hai magar har dafa ghalti ho jati hai........Darasal urdu main dono trha k nahi ka istimal hai.....But mostly Dramoo k dialougues k liye Noon k baghair nahi istimaal kiya jata hai kyonk yeh Bolnay main waisii hi awaz nikalta hai jaisay aap issay parhtay hoay mehsoos krtay hain....
    Islaah k liye bhi shukriya, Main aenda muhtaat hoon ga.... Phir say bohat Nawazish. Allah aap ka hami-o-nasir ho....

    ---------- Post added at 06:57 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:52 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Savi Abbas View Post
    Salam!! some time people get chance to read the words which come directly by someone's heart and soul......i can feel that this writing has super ability to reflect the women inner feelings about love...relations.....and practical life!! i want to salute you that being a male you wrote this bitter reality with full of sentimental thoughts and touched the height of women inner emotions!! i loved the the lines about the lover who loves her soul and showed the essence of pure love wid unselfishness!! i heartly congratulate you for this bold writing!! i am having hope that you will share more writings in coming future!! thanks alot and blessings!!
    Wsalam !!! Your words are precious to me. Thanks for putting your time in reading it, That was the ultimate reward of my piece of Writing. InshaAllah i'll keep my work up and share it with you people. After all you as a readers urge someone in keeping their spirit high. Thanks for accepting this bold topic. Once again, i heartly appriciate you for your words.

    ---------- Post added at 07:01 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:57 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by `BaaRish` View Post
    Bohat Acha Afsana ..!!
    Or Mujey ap ka Unwaan bhi Munfarid Sa Laga...!!
    Ek Zehreeli Sachai k Saath ...
    ye Duniya Aisi he Talkh hai ...
    Yahan Sirf Paisa he Chalta hai ...
    Or Aisi Ortein Hoti bhi badnaseeb he Hain...!!
    Bohat bohat shukriya aap ka issay parhnay k liye, sarahnay k liye aur apni raye k izhar k liye........Allah aap ka hami-o-nasr ho...

    ---------- Post added at 07:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:01 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Umeed-e-Nobahar View Post
    Hmm KhoOob, Bht Umdaaa

    bare hassas Mozoo pr qalam uthaya or baghair Bhtky huwe use


    kamal ahtiyat se paya-e-takmeel tk pohnchana kamal rakhta he

    keep writing
    Thank you Very much...I appriciate u for your words.....God bless you.

    ---------- Post added at 07:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:02 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Zunair View Post
    bhut khoob.........................
    Thank you vary much zunair....God bless you mate....

    ---------- Post added at 07:05 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:02 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by cymab View Post
    Buhat aacha afsaana likha hy ap ne.....
    Mujhay aise afssane aachey lagty hen jo zyida taveel na hon aur baat bhi clear kr den.
    Topic hassas tha tha par kehne ka aandaaz lajawab hy.
    Thanx for sharing and keep it up.
    Bas aik kawish thi jissay aap nay saraha....Umeed hai mari agli tehreeron ko bhi aap pasand krain gay.....I appriciate you for ur words and God bless you...Thanks once againnn

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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    BoHat UmmmDA TeHreEr KHoooBsurat

    LiKHte Aur sHare kArte RaHein ... !
    کہتے ہیں عشق نام کےگذرے ہیں اک بزرگ
    ہم لوگ بھی مرید اُسی سلسلے کے ہیں



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    CaLmInG MeLoDy is offline Banned
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    bohot bohot khoob..itna behtreen likha hai ap ne.ke lagta nahi ke aap ne qalam naya naya ya kuch waqt pehle thaama hai..meri taraf se itna khoobsoorat likhne pe bohot mubarakbaad qubool kijiye...

  12. #11
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    bohat bohat bohat acha hai....
    na srif wordings balkay baat ko bayaan karne ka tareeqa bhi bht umda hai....
    KEEP IT UP!!!!

  13. #12
    Mamin Mirza Guest
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Unwan say nahi laga k ye afsaana kis hawalay say hai.....mozo intehai hassas aur apnay aap main bohat mukhtalif noiyaat ka hai....magar aapne kamal maharat say ibteda say inteha tak usay ba khoobi nibhaya....na kahin rabt toota na kahin kahani ghum hoi .....bohat achay umer....likhtay rahiye aur share kartay rahiye,,,,aur iss hisay ko zara jaldi jaldi ronaq bakhsa karian....

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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    hmmmmm....so so nice......

  15. #14
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    boht khoobsoorat or behad haseen alfaaz ka imtizaj dheero dheer daad qubool kijiye or humesha likhte rahiye...ALLAH PAK ZOR E QALAM AOR DE AMEEN...KHUSH RAHIYE..
    kaash tu ik bar laot aye
    or main tere diye sare gham
    tujge laota don

  16. #15
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Quote Originally Posted by R oC k iN View Post
    BoHat UmmmDA TeHreEr KHoooBsurat LiKHte Aur sHare kArte RaHein ... !
    Yaar mujhe aap k comments ki bari khushi hoie hai...Iss dafa aap k, first time, mari tehreer pay comments main Ilfaz ki ginnati rawaytaan say zyada hai.... and if it is the case just for my piece of writing then it is honour for me...Thank you very much and God bless u...

    ---------- Post added at 07:54 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:50 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by ruby akram View Post
    bohot bohot khoob..itna behtreen likha hai ap ne.ke lagta nahi ke aap ne qalam naya naya ya kuch waqt pehle thaama hai..meri taraf se itna khoobsoorat likhne pe bohot mubarakbaad qubool kijiye...
    Thanks ruby !!! Appreciate that... Emmmm mara qalam say rishta kuch main iss trha byan kroon ga k har dafa likhnay pay mujhe aisay hi lagta hai jaisay main pehli baar likh rha hoon...aur yaqeen manain jab mujhe aisa nhi lagta, main likhta hi nhi....Mubarikbaad k liye shukriya....bohat shukriya....

    ---------- Post added at 07:55 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:54 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Wafa Chaghtai View Post
    bohat bohat bohat acha hai....
    na srif wordings balkay baat ko bayaan karne ka tareeqa bhi bht umda hai....
    KEEP IT UP!!!!
    Bohat bohat shukriya.... and thanks for motivation...God bless u...

    ---------- Post added at 08:01 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:55 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Mamin Mirza View Post
    Unwan say nahi laga k ye afsaana kis hawalay say hai.....mozo intehai hassas aur apnay aap main bohat mukhtalif noiyaat ka hai....magar aapne kamal maharat say ibteda say inteha tak usay ba khoobi nibhaya....na kahin rabt toota na kahin kahani ghum hoi .....bohat achay umer....likhtay rahiye aur share kartay rahiye,,,,aur iss hisay ko zara jaldi jaldi ronaq bakhsa karian....
    Mukhtalif noiyat ka toh tha...
    "junoniat main mohabbat andhi ho jati hai jabk urfaniat mohabbat ko jila bakhsh dati hai..."
    thanks for the words of appriciaton....baqi mujhe jab bhi wqat milta hai main kuch na kuch zaroor likhta hoon, magar masroofiat ki wjah say musalsaal aur baqaida nhi likh skta....Baqi phir say bohat bohat shukriya....God bless you

    ---------- Post added at 08:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 08:01 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by sunnyshah_6 View Post
    hmmmmm....so so nice......
    Thanks alot.....

    ---------- Post added at 08:03 PM ---------- Previous post was at 08:02 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by lalanaz View Post
    boht khoobsoorat or behad haseen alfaaz ka imtizaj dheero dheer daad qubool kijiye or humesha likhte rahiye...ALLAH PAK ZOR E QALAM AOR DE AMEEN...KHUSH RAHIYE..
    Dua aur Tareef k liye bohat nawazish aur dil say shukriya....Aap ki taraf say motivation ki hamesha zaroorat rhy gee.... Allah aap ka hami-o-nasar ho...

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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    wonderful awesome mind blowing ek bohot he umda tehreer specially "chahna he sab kuch nahi hota chahe jane k ehsas" i love it .thanks brother to share this with us God bless u keep writing and share with us
    I dropped a tear in the ocean, when they find it, I'll stop loving you.

  18. #17
    subiya's Avatar
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Bahut hi acha likha hai apne..........
    keep writing...!!!!!!!
    Thanx 4 sharing.....

  19. #18
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    hmmm mr dani u r a good writer,, imprasive tahreer..keep it up...


  20. #19
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    Very very nice......................


    ιк "кυη" ρε qααүιм ∂υηιүα

    ιк "кυη" ρε ғαηαα нσ נαүε gι

  21. #20
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    Re: Afsana : Woh Kaun Tha?

    salam....aur pehle tu buhat buhat shukria itni achi tehreer share karny ke liye..............
    aur ab sab ne kuch na kuch bol hi dia hai is ke bare main tu main bas yehi kahon ga ke mujhe tu ye tehreer ajj ke moshre ki talkh sachi lagi jisko app ne buhat umdgi ke sath bayan kia..................

    aur app ke liye aik shair hope u like it...........

    dayar-e-missar main dekha hai hum ne doulat ko
    sitam zareef PEGHAMBAR hareed leti hai

    سوچتا ہوں کے موت آنے تک
    زندہ رہنے میں کیا قباحت ہے

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