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Thread: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

      
   
  1. #1
    Talha I's Avatar
    Talha I is offline Expert Member
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    Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    Assalam O Alaikum..Bohot dinon baad ek ghazal likhi hai.. pata nahi pasand aye ap logon ko ke nahi.. bahar haal mera kaam tou share karna hai .. tanqeed ka intizaar rahega Shukrya!

    Waqt yun hi badal jata hai lehjon ki tarah,
    Woh mere pas tou ata hai par ajnabion ki tarah,

    Nakamiyon ka saamna karna zara us se seekh lo,
    Jo gir ke sanbhal jata hai siknadaron ki tarah,

    Tere ghum mein kayi saal mene yun guzare hain,
    Jese koi qaid mein para ho murdon ki tarah,

    Bohot bechein hun mein tughse yeh kehne ke liyeh,
    Ke mujhse phir se hum kalaam ho gaye dinon ki tarah,

    Hudood e ishq ke qail tamaam logon se yeh kehdo,
    Ishq hota hai la mehdood aasmanon ki tarah,

    Jab bhi saamna hota hai mera apni hasti se musafir~,
    Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah..

    Composed by
    Talha Imam (Musafir~)

    If pain could speak; it would have so much to tell.

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  3. #21
    CaLmInG MeLoDy is offline Banned
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    very good janab...!!!..lakin aik bat samajh nahi aayee....aap aur itni serious poetry...

  4. #22
    ‹^› E S T A S Y ‹^› is offline ~ FK ~
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    nice,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  5. #23
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    bohat khoob achi kosish ha...





  6. #24
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    khoob ! daad hazir hai.

  7. #25
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    awesome..........!!!!bot zabardast.......
    moula apko hamesha khush rakhay....r es se b achi gazal lekhny k qabill bany ameen..... ameen..........!!!!

  8. #26
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    walaikumassalam ...

    janab shattered sahab..aap ne share kar ke acha kiya..aur..aap ki koshish achi rahi...lekin..mehnat ki zarorat hai..

    apne khayal ko aapne achi terah se zaher toh kiya hai lekin ravani toot rahi hai..is ka hal ye hai k ek misra jab likh lo to baar baar padh kar dekhaiN ap khud samajh jaoge..

    dosera 'lehjoN,murdoN' k saath 'rishtoN,rasmoN,lamhoN,rastoN' jaise words rhyme karte haiN.. is baat ka khayal rakhaiN..

    umeed hai meri baatoN ka bura na mana jayega..inshallah.



    Let me hide in You, from everything that distracts me from You, from everything that comes in my way when I want to run to You.

















  9. #27
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    OMG !! .. I cant belive u wrote dat !! .. Y r u soo zabardast Talha ... I m jealousssss ... ..

    It was awesomeeee .. Sweety ... lakin i need some explanations on 2 lines ..


    "Tere ghum mein kayi saal mene yun guzare hain,
    Jese koi qaid mein para ho murdon ki tarah," ( KIU GUZARAY YAAR .. phlay bata daitay Ii wud have come on fk b4 )

    Bohot bechein hun mein tughse yeh kehne ke liyeh,
    Ke mujhse phir se hum kalaam ho gaye dinon ki tarah, ( Yeh wala 2nd line i dint understand )





  10. #28
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    to app shair bhi hainKhud hi likha hai na Jis ne bhi likha hai zabardast likha hai
    Tumhari yaad ke jub zakham bharne lagte hain
    Kisi bahane tumhein yaad karne lagte hain
    Faiz Ahmed Faiz

  11. #29
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    nice.................

  12. #30
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    bro bht hi khoob soorta gazal hai..Mashallah....alfaz nhi hain tareef k liye...Allah apko --taraqi de her kam main..apki her naik tamana pori ho...keep it up...Allah bless you.....

  13. #31
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    bohat hi acha likha hay aap nay bas itna kehnaa chahoon gi k jo aap ki tamanna hay woh puri ho ja'ay cx,muhabbat nahin milti tau buhat kuch badal k rkh deti hay hatta k insaan ko b .....








  14. #32
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    buhat umda..........................

  15. #33
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    Waqt yun hi badal jata hai lehjon ki tarah,
    Woh mere pas tou ata hai par ajnabion ki tarah,


    Mashallah chotu...tum ho to kaafi chotay lekin likhtay kamaal ka ho...
    likhtay raho...


    Be You.
    The World Will Adjust.


  16. #34
    Talha I's Avatar
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    Quote Originally Posted by ~sahiba~ View Post
    walaikumassalam ...

    janab shattered sahab..aap ne share kar ke acha kiya..aur..aap ki koshish achi rahi...lekin..mehnat ki zarorat hai..

    apne khayal ko aapne achi terah se zaher toh kiya hai lekin ravani toot rahi hai..is ka hal ye hai k ek misra jab likh lo to baar baar padh kar dekhaiN ap khud samajh jaoge..

    dosera 'lehjoN,murdoN' k saath 'rishtoN,rasmoN,lamhoN,rastoN' jaise words rhyme karte haiN.. is baat ka khayal rakhaiN..

    umeed hai meri baatoN ka bura na mana jayega..inshallah.
    Apka bht shukrya ke apni meri tehreer ko itni ehmiyat di ..
    Ghaltiyan smjh mein agayi shukrya

    ---------- Post added at 10:09 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:08 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Sakura~ View Post
    to app shair bhi hainKhud hi likha hai na Jis ne bhi likha hai zabardast likha hai
    lol .. ji Alhumdullilah shayeri karta hun..
    aur sharings bhi hain ghoom phir ke dekh lein

  17. #35
    arooj fatima's Avatar
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    22222222 nice,,, but i don't have words for these 2 lines,,,
    Nakamiyon ka saamna karna zara us se seekh lo,
    Jo gir ke sanbhal jata hai siknadaron ki tarah,
    liked it most...
    thumbs up shatterd... keep it up.

  18. #36
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    janab achay khayalat ka izhaar ker gaye aap.
    likhtay rahyea, inshallah behteri aye gi..
    aabad rahyea..ameen
    Khayal-ger



  19. #37
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    bht acha likha hai.......



    ************
    ڈوبا ہوا ہے دل میرا خوابوں کی جھیل میں

    آنکھوں میں خواہشوں کی تھکن کا خمار ہے


    **********





  20. #38
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    Nice effort dear but still need a lot to do. Aap ne jo qafiye istemal kiye hain wo theek nahi hain aur wazan bhi theek nahi hai. Guzarish hai k mehnat kijiye.

    ZaY







    Ðoñ’t wålk å$ µ aRe kîñg,
    wålk å$ µ doñ’T ¢åRè who Thè kîñg IS






  21. #39
    Shab-e-Firaaq's Avatar
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    Aghar main ghalat nahin hoon tu aap Purane waley Musafir hain aap nay ID shayeed change ki hai :-?

    khair likha acha hai ..

    khush rahiye ..




    Kuch Khwaab Jo Na Dekhein Tu GuZra Nahin Hota .. !!




    Hum Na'Janey Kis Pa'l Main Saniha ho Jaein Gay ..


  22. #40
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    Re: Kuch khuwab bikhar jatay hain kirchiyon ki tarah

    wah! Bohat khoob ..Really very nice ghazal Talha ..khyal bohat acha hai ..

    keep writing ....................


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